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Golf Dictionary H - L
Golf Dictionary what Golf
terms really mean
H
Halve - In match play, to tie a hole. Thus, if
player A and player B both have a 5 on the 14th hole, they have
"halved" the hole. Incidentally, that phrase is pronounced,
"they have paved" because the "l" in "halve"
is silent, a fascinating fact that player A may want to discuss
with player B during the latter's backswing on the 15th tee.
Handicap - An allocation of strokes on one or more
holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally
poorly on the same course.
Hazard - A man-made obstacle on the course, either
a bunker or a water hazard. It is against the rules for players
to "ground" their clubs in a hazard, i.e., to allow the
clubhead to touch the sand or water before making their shots. They
may, however, bury their own head in their hands, strike their forehead
with the base of their palms, shake their head vigorously from side
to side (with or without their hand placed on their brow) and, if
it does not delay the match, lightly and repeatedly tap their head
against a tree.
Head - The end of the club that produces bollixes
and mis-hits as opposed to the end of the club that produces calluses
and blisters.
Hickory - Tough, resilient wood originally used
for golf club shafts. The chromed steel tubing employed today has
superior strength and durability, but old-time golfers insist that
there is nothing more satisfying than the crisp snap of a hickory-shafted
club being broken sharply across the knee or the delicate aroma
of an entire set of clubs burning merrily in a fireplace.
Hit it in the head To hit the top of the ball.
Hole –
1. To hit the ball into the hole, as in "I
holed my putt for a five."
2. The cup in the green into which the ball is
hit, as in "Five" Try again, buster-you're in the hole
in twelve."
3. One of 9 or 18 playing areas constituting a
golf course, as in "On that hole I had a drive, two approach
shots and two putts-that makes five."
4. A missing element or discrepancy in a narrative
or a fault or flaw in logic or reasoning, as in "Your story
is full of holes-what about those two lost balls, the stroke in
the water hazard and the out-of-bounds shot?"
5. An aperture or opening, as in "You have
a hole in your head-those were practice swings."
6. Indebtedness, as in "You lost, you weasel-you're
in the hole to me for fifty bucks."
7. An embarrassing predicament or position, as
in "Oh, yeah? Well, I'm not paying, so how do you like them
apples? But you fork over fifty clams or you'll be in a real hole
at work when I tell your' boss about how when you're supposed to
be with your clients you're out on the golf course and your wife
about that doxie you met on the putting green"
8. An excavation or cavity, as in "The body
was found in a shallow hole in a sand trap by the thirteenth green."
Hole-in-One - An occurrence in which a ball is
hit directly from the tee into the hole on a single shot by a golfer
playing alone.
Home Course - A place where your chief handicap
is that everyone knows exactly what it is.
Honour - The privilege of being laughed at first
on the tee.
Hooding the club - A stroke in which the golfer
moves his hands ahead and tilts the club head forward (to reduce
the club's loft). Done to make the ball fly lower or to get more
distance than normal from a club.
Hook & Slice- To hit a shot that curves sharply
left (hook) or right (slice), respectively. Players who do one or
the other should consider changing the way they stand, hold the
club, or swing. Players who do both should consider changing the
way they spend their weekends.
I
Identifying the Ball - Except in a hazard, players
may, without incurring a penalty, lift a ball they think is theirs
and clean it for purposes of identification. After doing so, they
must put it back in exactly the same spot from which they took it.
However, most golfers are aware that in the few seconds needed to
complete this manoeuvre, the earth itself has moved in a number
of directions, both because of its own rotation and due to the movements
it shares with the solar system and the galaxy, and they compensate
for these motions by shifting the position of the ball from, say,
the muddy divot hole from which it was removed to a point a few
trillionths of an Astronomical Unit away (about a foot) occupied
by a nice tuft of grass.
Iffy lie A questionable lie, where it is uncertain
how the ball will react when struck.
Impossible Lie - A ball that is in a position that
is both completely obstructed by an immovable object and continuously
observed by an incorruptible player.
In The last nine holes of the course, also known
as the inward half. You're moving in toward the clubhouse.
In his bag Expression used by a golfer who is confident
in his ability to pull off a certain shot. The shot is in his bag.
Instruction - Golf is virtually impossible to learn
from a book, and some personalised instruction is absolutely essential,
but there are a handful of simple admonitions that every player
would do well to commit to memory:
· Don't lock your knees.
· Don't bend your left arm.
· Don't loosen your grip.
· Don't pick up your head.
· Don't count out loud.
· Don't write in ink on your scorecard.,
Irons - 1. Penology. Variously shaped pieces of
metal by the use of which individuals are subjected to torment.
2. Golf. Variously shaped pieces of metal by the use of which individuals
are subjected to torment.
Is that any good? Rhetorical question posed to
stunned opponents by a golfer who has just hit a career-best shot
.
J
Jack and Jill event A tournament played by one-man-one-woman
teams.
Jail Where a golf ball usually lies after a hacker
hits it. A place from which escape is nearly impossible. Deep rough,
woods, buried lies, and other unpleasant places represent jail for
a golf ball. (See also dead.)
Jigger - 1. Traditional short pitching iron used
to get out of trouble on holes 1 through 18. 2. Traditional short
measuring glass used to get into trouble at hole 19.
Jump on it To strike the ball with maximum force,
with the hope of achieving maximum distance from the club used.
Jungle The thickest, deepest, nastiest rough on
the course.
Junior - A golfer who attributes poor play to the
fact that he or she lacks the experience of a mature player.
K
Keeping Score - In general, golfers assign a number
exactly one higher than the previous one for each shot they play
to arrive at the cumulative total of all the strokes required to
complete a given hole. While it has the merit of simplicity, this
system does tend to produce discouragingly high numbers, and players
who perennially score in the 90s or higher might think about switching
to an unconventional numbering system which, while still adhering
strictly to the custom of counting each and every stroke, nevertheless
provides a more acceptable result. Two excellent candidates are
the arithmetic series -2,-1,0,1,2,3,4 etc. and 1,2,2,3,3,3,4,4,4,4
etc. Also worth considering are binary numbers, which, no matter
how large, are always composed of zeros and ones, and Roman numerals,
whose simple written form (the key golf numbers 4,5,6,7 and 8 are
indicated by IV,V,VI,VII and VIII) permits alteration of the scorecard
with the effortless erasure or addition of an "I" or two
rather than the complex conversion of, say, a telltale Arabic "9"
into a "5."
Kick Literally, the way the ball bounces. Sometimes
it kicks your way and sometimes it doesn't, but golfers are always
asking for a good kick.
Knee-knocker A putt in the three-to-four-foot range
that causes emotional and physical problems for the golfer. The
term comes from the nervous trembling that accompanies these short
putts. Every golfer experiences a knee-knocker at some time. (See
also throw-up range and yips.}
Knickers - Baggy trousers worn by golfers in the
1930s. They were called "plus fours" because they were
cut off four inches below the knee, then tucked into long socks.
Plus fours have disappeared from golf courses, and the only golfing
apparel anything like them that exists today is a much more appealing
form of attire, worn by women, known as "minus tens."
Knife The one iron. The toughest club to hit. If
you carry a 'knife in your bag, you're either a real player or a
phony who wants to look like a real player. A few swings with the
knife will reveal the true you. Lee Trevino advises golfers caught
in a lightning storm to hold their one irons aloft because "even
God can't hit a one iron."
Knockoff A club that is a clone or forgery of an
original design. Knockoff clubs are attractive to golfers because
they're so much less expensive than the clubs they imitate.
L
Ladies' Days & Hours - Times set aside by a
golf club during which the use of the course is exclusively reserved
for women players, who are sometimes barred at other times. The
number of women playing golf has increased dramatically in recent
years, but as the institution of Ladies' Days and Hours indicates,
their presence on courses is still objectionable to male players
who take the game of golf very seriously and resent the sudden intrusion
into their hallowed pastime of the lady golfer, whose insistence
on actually hitting balls toward the holes interferes with the conduct
of business deals, interrupts the recounting of lengthy comic narratives,
and impedes the timely exchange of critical information on the recent
performance of automobiles and the relative prospects of sports
teams.
Ladies' Tees - Teeing areas placed somewhat closer
to the greens to compensate for the fact that although women are
as capable as men of playing first-rate golf, they do not, as a
rule, hit the ball as far. Other allowances made for women golfers
to permit them to hold their own during rounds with male players
include giving them, along with their scorecards, a copy of The
Wall Street Journal, a booklet of old jokes and a laminated card
on which is printed key data on the recent performance of various
cars and ball clubs.
Lag - A long putt played conservatively to make
sure that the ball ends up near enough to the hole to be sunk with
the next stroke. If this putt is missed, it is referred to as an
"aaag."
Lay up - To aim short of the green and chip on
rather than attempt a long or otherwise risky approach shot.
Leaf rule - Rule used in certain parts of America
during autumn allowing a golfer to play another ball without penalty
when his previous shot is lost and assumed covered by leaves. The
leaf rule can cause a lot of arguments. You can protect against
opponents invoking this rule by carrying a book of matches and gasoline
in your golf bag.
Left-handed Golfers - Although golf, with its overwhelming
right-handed orientation, penalises left-handed players more than
other sports do, it also provides two significant advantages to
"southgrips": most golfers can't borrow your spare golf
glove and they can't demonstrate the "right way to swing that
club" after you muff your drive.
Legs - A ball is said to have "legs"
if it continues to roll a significant distance after landing. If
it bounces into the rough and becomes wedged under a rock or in
the crook of a tree, it is said to have "claws." If it
runs down a bank and into a water hazard, it has "fins."
If, on a putt, it rings the cup without going in, it has "lips."
And if it does all these things on the same hole, it is given "wings"
and flung into the underbrush.
Lie - 1. Where the ball comes to rest after being
hit by a golfer. 2. The number of strokes it took to get it there,
as reported by that golfer.
Links - Golf courses are often referred to as "links,"
but, strictly speaking, this term applies only to a course laid
out over the natural contours of the bleak, wind-swept land along
the sea, as was the original course at St. Andrews. At first glance,
the lush golf courses in the U.S. seem to bear little resemblance
to their austere Scottish progenitor, but tradition is very important
in the game of golf and American clubs have made every effort to
be true to their Highland roots. For example, no towel in any golf
club's locker room exceeds 2 square feet in area or 1/20th of an
inch in thickness; no light bulb in any washroom is ever of a wattage
greater than 25; no radiator in any dressing room achieves a temperature
higher than 66°, nor is hot water ever warmer than 88°;
walls are painted only in years divisible by 16, and no
object or mechanism is replaced until the end of
the decade in which it first broke or ceased to function; and all
facilities for women are faithfully patterned after the original
Wee Lassies' Changing Boothy in a leaky greenskeeper's but overlooking
the Firth of Fife.
Lip - 1. Perimeter of grass surrounding the hole.
2. Remarks made by fellow golfer when your putt stops there.
Lip out A putt that hits the lip and spins out.
Local Rules - A set of regulations that are ignored
only by players on one specific course rather than by golfers as
a whole.
Loft - The angle of a clubface and the corresponding
steepness of the shot it will produce. Loft angles range from the
relatively shallow ones used for long, unobstructed shots (12°
for a driver, 20° for a fairway wood, 30° for a 5-iron)
to the much steeper ones needed to clear obstacles (47 ° for
a 9-iron, 58° for a sand wedge, 75° for the tip of a golf
shoe, and up to 100° for a throwing arm).
Loose Impediments - Natural and legally movable
objects that interfere with play, such as dazed or disoriented reptiles
or mammals, stunned birds, pulverised stones, flattened bushes,
uprooted shrubs, severed branches and felled trees, or if you are
Tiger Woods boulders that require a complete work crew to move.
Lost Ball - An opponent's missing ball after 90
seconds of searching, or one of your own after 20 minutes.
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